Big Fat Dose of Reality

Cause You Just Never Know Who Might Be Baking Your Pie

When we recently traveled to Utah to visit my family, we drove over Cedar Mountain and through Mt. Carmel Junction, Utah - where apparently, all the pies there are made by Ho's.

Awesome.

(Yes, Matt pulled over JUST so I could take this picture. I was giggling like a schoolgirl, while Dylan said, "what's so funny? What's a Ho?")

Little Known Fact

Wise men, shepherds and a drummer boy weren't the ONLY ones there.

(You'd think that one of my kids would have placed Godzilla in the Nativity, right? Nope. It was my hubby. Yet another reason why I truly LOVE this man.)

Merry Christmas!

Now THAT'S Honesty.

He didn't even ASK for anything.

Wait, wait...so does this mean we don't have to buy anything?

Sun Maid Girls Gets Implants

Betty Crocker gets a makeover? Fine. Aunt Jemima's look is updated? That's ok. I wasn't a fan of the bandana look anyway. But mess with the Sun Maid girl? Alright, now you've just gone

too far.

wholesome, sweet Sun Maid raisin girl

Sun maid girl after her visit to Dr. Rey

What is this world coming to? Before you know it, Little Debbie will be sporting fishnets and thick black eyeliner.

Stop the madness!

Creativity Rules.

I Dare You Not to Laugh at This

Dylan's Latest Obsession

The Gloved One. Dylan has discovered Michael Jackson's music and LOVES it. He now knows all the words to Beat It, Bad and Thriller. Working on Smooth Criminal.

See what I found when I pushed aside the shower curtain the other day?


See what I mean? Obsessed.

(In Dylan's defense, he DOES know how to spell his name. We only have one of each letter so he did his best with what he had.)

Fashion Smashion: SERIOUSLY?!?!

I surf, so you don't have to. Seriously folks - these items are FOR SALE on a couple of different websites. I am NOT naming them, lest you lose your sanity for a moment and actually order something. I won't be held responsible for that kind of nonsense.

Pink. With zippers. Nice.


Ugh. Well, I suppose Lady Gaga has to shop, too...


For those days when you just don't want to leave anything to the imagination...MESH shorts. Classy.

Friday Funnies or Why I Love Paul Rudd

Need a lift? Watch this:



Oddly enough, I know guys who use to dance like this. Hopefully they don't anymore.

Have a good weekend :)

Funnies on Friday: The First Celebrity Swine Flu Victim

Poor, Poor Kermit. Darn that Miss Piggy.

Happy Mothers Day

(Thanks for the laugh, Mindi. You always find the best stuff!)

Fashion Smashion: Buyers Must Think We Are All Idiots

Seriously??

And you can have these bad boys for the low, low price of only $282.00.

OR - - you can send me $50.00 and I can MAKE you some with a pair of $29.99 Old Navy jeans and a bottle of bleach.

Your choice.

It's Good to be Oblivious.

Conversation with Zack (as related to me by Aunt Tishele)...

Zack (from the other room): Mom.

Mom: (no response)

Zack (still from the other room): MOM!

Mom: (still no response)

Zack(STILL from the other room): MOM!

Mom: (No response. Totally oblivious.)

Zack, turning to Tishele to say with a sigh: Hang on a second. She only hears me when I touch her.

Zack, now touching mom lightly on the shoulder: Mom?

Mom: What, Zack?
*****************************
Ladies and gentlemen, I have now perfected the art of totally and completely tuning out my children.

Things to Do in a Small Town While on Vacation

Fly a man-eating kite (seriously. This kite was out for BLOOD) at the Sand Dunes.

Matt and Mia

Swing really high on the BEST tire swing in the world.

niece Kelly

Oooo and Ahhhh over 1,000 year old pottery found by some strange man (allegedly) that I definitely DO NOT know.

(Ooooo.....Ahhhhhh....)

Admire and be slightly jealous over sister-in-law's crafty Easter skills.

Giggle every time you pass by THIS police car parked along side the road that keeps people from speeding through this small town. Why do I giggle, you ask?


Because THIS guy is driving the car.

(Take a close look. I am sure they replace him with the real thing every once in a while, just to mess with smart-alecks like me who think they know it all.)

A Dragon's Prayer

...as translated by Dylan.

"Dear Heavenly Father, I am fankful for this Madsen Family. I am fankful for Dylan because he loves me and he's cool and nice. I am fankful for Dylan's mom (and she's my mom) because she kisses me goodnight and lets me lick her face. I am fankful for Zacky and Daddy and Dylan and Mom, but mostly Dylan.

Amen."

Nothing but Love for Adam, BUT...

NOT lovin' the hair last night, buddy. Not at all.

How much Aqua Net do you think it took?

Saw this comparison over at TMZ and completely agree.

Oh, Paula and Too Much TV, Perhaps?

Paula was wearing THIS getup to the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards on Saturday night:

After being attacked by rabid teens at the mall.

Don't get me wrong, Paula - I am all for being young and hip. My husband teases me on a regular basis because I listen to 'hit' music most all the time. Kayne West is on my ringtone, for heaven sake. BUT - sometimes you can look like you are just trying TOO HARD. I believe you should dress your age. Now I'm not saying she needs to be wearing mom jeans and a button down, but come on already!

And while we're on the subject of TV (*ahem*) stars, when Dylan woke up this morning, I asked him if he had a good nights sleep.

"Yes I did." he replied.

"Did you have good dreams?" I asked.

"Yes I did, but it ended with something funny," he said.

"What was that?" I asked.

"At the end of my dream it said TO BE CONTINUED."

Yep - it's good to have something to look forward to.

So Why Don't You Tell Me How You REALLY Feel?

One of these days, I am totally gonna get brave enough to buy, and then USE, these...

(Yes, these cards really do exist. Would you dare to use one? Come on - tell me the truth. I really wanna know.)

Text From My Sister Amanda This Morning...

...and I quote, "Contractions suck."

Amen, sister. Amen.

(yes, this is her 8 1/2 months pregnant belly. Mine was like...twice this size. It's a good thing I love her so much, or I'd really hate her.)